WARNING… I’m going to discuss with a little detail how unattractive parts of my body look these days. I’m very hopeful that this is a temporary condition since I’m still a work in progress. If this would be TMI (too much information) for you, stop reading and close the window. I’m two months shy of my 49th birthday and as far as I know, only my husband thinks I’m attractive. (The guys at the gym are comfortable pointing out the “hot” girls to me – and they don’t look anything like me and are certainly not as old as me. So I guess I’m not “hot”. I’m a “mom”. She rolls her eyes as she types.)

As excited as I am about losing the weight – 58 pounds so far from heaviest weight – there have been some unexpected side effects that aren’t pretty. I have extra skin everywhere. If the fat is gone, the skin looks wrinkly. Yuk. If there is still a layer of fat under that skin, it looks flabby. Double yuk.

The parts that bug me the most are under the neck, under the arms, and under the butt. As I lose more body fat, the flesh is getting thinner in these places. I used to have one or two extra wrinkles under my butt. I didn’t think they were that thick, but now that I have 4 or 5, I must have lost more fat to make the skin folds thinner. The last time Trainer Adam took my measurements, my neck was smaller. That surprised me. But I’m encouraged because I think the extra flesh under my chin is tightening. Hope that happens with my butt.

I see ribs in places I’ve never seen them before. It’s cool. But gravity is not being kind to what’s little is left of my breasts. It’s pretty easy to see if there is any muscle development in my pectorals because… well, there just isn’t much left in front of them. Everything has moved south. And what’s there is starting to look like deflated balloons. My inspiration, Tosca Reno, is pretty open about getting implants after her weight loss. I’m not considering it, but I understand why someone my age would want to get that done. Especially after a big weight loss. The flab on the sides of my chest bugs me the most. It just spills over the smaller bras. BTW – I’m back into the size I was in my 20’s, except that I need a underwires now. I obviously don’t look the same as I did then. I do have these strange parts that are shrinking, but I also have a lot more muscle. And I feel a lot better than I did in my 20’s.

The rolls on my stomach are shrinking and that’s very exciting because that area has been really stubborn. Tosca called it a “menopot” in her book. I’m trying to give myself abs for Christmas. I used to have one belly, then it became three smaller rolls. Now, I’m down to two smaller rolls and one skin roll on the top. I caught myself walking around the classroom the other day just poking my obliques because I could – they were there and they were tight. I’m highly motivated to lose these last 15 pounds so I can see the work I’ve been doing.

OK – I admit that this blog may not be inspiring. But I had a conversation with someone this week that made me think that the ladies who are following my program might find this interesting. Please know that I find all of this amusing and don’t worry about it at all. Or not much. Alright, I’m lying. I worry about it a little because my goal is to be on stage in a bikini someday.
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